i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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