Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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