He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
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