i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
