she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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