when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
