if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
