I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Randomize