matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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