hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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