I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
