is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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