shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
She's the barista slut.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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