Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
