'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
