She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
