dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
