I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
i would punch a child for taco bell
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
