i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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