DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize