so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize