try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
