So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize