fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
