Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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