That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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