One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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