Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize