i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
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