He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I can't turn off my feet"
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
