My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I see more hoeing in ur future
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