i think my mom watched the whole time
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
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