your parents love me but you hate me
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
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