I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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