There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
