he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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