I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
