I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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