Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
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