No, you can still breathe under the balls.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
