My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
