So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
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I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
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The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.