Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
