Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
