I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize