Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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