Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I need moral support for this bender
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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