He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
