He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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