I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
