Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Randomize
